Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it.. Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q:Should I reduce my alcohol intake? A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q:How can I calculate my body/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies your ratio is two to one, etc.
Q:What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q:Aren't fried foods bad for you? A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure? A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'
AND......
For those of you who watch what you eat , here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
CONCLUSION
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
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Who in the World Lives the Longest and Why By Kathleen Bowers Published: Monday, October 1, 2007 - 17:02
We hear that with every generation, people are living longer. But just how much longer? Well, last year, Los Angeles resident, Mark Johnson died at the age of 112. He was thought to be the oldest living Californian and oldest surviving veteran of World War I. What's more, doctors who performed the autopsy said that his body was like that of a 50 year-old, and here's the catch: His diet was largely sausages and waffles! Hmmm... does that mean that sausages and waffles will give you the body of someone half your age, and help you live to an amazingly ripe old age too?
Well, no. As any good scientist will tell you, data taken from the life of one person doesn't prove anything, no matter how interesting it may be. But if an entire region lived to amazingly old age, well, that would be something to pay attention to.
And in fact, there are a few remote locations where not just a few people but most of the population lives well into their 90s and beyond. Studies show that people in Okinawa, Japan; Sardinia, Italy; and the Caucasus Mountains in Russia all live exceptionally long, healthy lives. A surprising number of them live to be not just 100, but 110, or even older. So, what is it about these people? And what can we learn from them that could help us live longer, healthier lives too?
Ducking the Golden Handshake
These three geographically diverse cultures share similar attitudes about work. For example, Okinawan octogenarian Zenei Nakamura is still working as a fisherman, as he has done all his life. He says, "My children tell me to stop fishing, but it is fun, and I feel more powerful doing it." A cultural profile of the Caucasian people points up a similar attitude toward physical labor: researchers comment that these people work "like beasts," eat little, and spend most of their leisure time sleeping.
All three communities depend on farming, fishing, and game. They spend a most of their time in the open air, which some have claimed is the secret to their longevity. But in fact, the single most common factor among these various people groups is physical activity.
Researchers have suggests that limited food quantities, daily exercise, and the lack of stress may all be factors that lead to long life. Hmmm... so that calorie-restricted diet may add on years as well subtracting pounds!
Reach Out and Touch Someone
All three of these long-lived communities boast strong social networks. And sexuality plays a role as well. The Okinawan Study that brought attention to the long lives of these people discovered that Okinawan elders have higher levels of sex hormones than their contemporaries in other parts of the world.
Other studies suggest that friendship, love, and social connections may hold clues to longevity and health for all of us. Men may benefit more than women, however.
-------------------- Wise men learn more from fools than fools from the wise.
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My wife said she wanted to get breast implants because she was sick of having small boobs. I told her to wipe a piece of toilet paper between them every day and they would get bigger on their own. She looked at me kind of funny and said how is that gonna make my boobs bigger. I said it worked on your ass didn't it!!!!
quote:Originally posted by jgrecoconstr: My wife said she wanted to get breast implants because she was sick of having small boobs. I told her to wipe a piece of toilet paper between them every day and they would get bigger on their own. She looked at me kind of funny and said how is that gonna make my boobs bigger. I said it worked on your ass didn't it!!!!
Probably an old one but I loved it!!
Geez! saying that to a woman is suicide!!!
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I come from a family of Great athletes with lean muscular bodies, and played sports my whole life. My main sport was wrestling like my dad. I wrestled all year round since 1st grade.
Any way the greastest feeling and sense of well being I ever experienced in my life was during wrestling season while I was cutting weight and doing extreme exercise. Im from New Jersey were wrestling is big like Iowa, ohio, Penn, ect.
So cutting calories combined with lots of exercise is the key to overall health from my experinces.
Toxins are stored in our body fat and make us sick...if you restrict calories and exercise you burn the fat...freeing up toxins and free radicals.
Also, this is why fasting in so many religions is common. When you restrict food, you body isn't wasting energy on digesting food...and the brain functions more clearly making one able to pray or meditate better. If your a christian, then an interesting fact is that the three on the mount of transfiguration....were the only 3 in the bible that fasted for 40 days and nights.
So the only three that were personaly taken up to heaven with GOD were Jesus, Moses, and Elijah...and they were the only ones that fasted that extreme......
So there is obviously something special or miraculous about fasting and restricting calories....in fact FASTING can acutaly heal many diseases but doctors and health care industry don't want people to know!
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fat and make us sick...if you restrict calories and exercise you burn the fat...freeing up toxins and free radicals.
i know that's a common knowledge "fact" but the truth is that your brain by weight is more than 60% fat...
some people "feel best" on heroin... heroin works cuz it mimicks endorphins which you are producing when you work out and starve yourself...
and as a wrestelr who NEVER ever cut weight i can tell you that i kicked alot of azz on dudes with arms as big as my legs cuz i wasn't in a weakened altered state... i was runner up in state twice.
-------------------- Don't envy the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise.
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