Allstocks.com's Bulletin Board Post New Topic  Post A Reply
my profile login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Allstocks.com's Bulletin Board » Off-Topic Post, Non Stock Talk » Dont fart in bed

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Dont fart in bed
AgentGPF
Member


Icon 1 posted      Profile for AgentGPF     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.
The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and
the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every
morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it
was making her sick. He told her he could not stop it and that it was
perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that
one day he would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for
dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where
she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the
spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and
went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling
back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his
underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting
which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic
footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control
herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After
years of torture, she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his
bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.

He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me
and I didn't listen to you".

"What do you mean?" asked his wife.

"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts
out, and today it finally happened.

But by the grace of God, some Vaseline and two fingers, I think I got
most of them back in.

--------------------
Well done is better than well said. Ben Franklin

Posts: 718 | From: Bay Area, CA | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob Frey
Member


Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted      Profile for Bob Frey     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
http://www.pregnancy.org/photo/data/3411/532thought_for_the_day.jpg
Posts: 3417 | From: Cleveland, Ohio | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
IWISHIHAD
Member


Icon 1 posted      Profile for IWISHIHAD     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
AgentGPF that was a good one, i have not laughed that hard in a long time did not expect the ending.
Posts: 3875 | From: ca. | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Allstocks.com Message Board Home

© 1997 - 2021 Allstocks.com. All rights reserved.

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classic™ 6.7.2

Share