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Author Topic: What is the most outrageous conspiracy theory you ever heard?
Griffon
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Found this site and thought we could ease back from earlier tensions with some fun:

http://forums.winamp.com/showthread.php?threadid=248557

here's a good start

Approximately 7 hours before shooting the President, Booth dropped by the Washington hotel which was Vice-President Andrew Johnson's residence. Upon learning from the desk clerk that neither Johnson nor his private secretary, William A. Browning, was in the hotel, Booth wrote the following note: "Don't wish to disturb you Are you at home? J. Wilkes Booth." Browning testified before the military court that he found the note in his box later that afternoon. Did Johnson and Booth know each other? In the 1997 publication "Right or Wrong, God Judge Me": The Writings of John Wilkes Booth edited by John Rhodehamel and Louise Taper it is stated on p. 146 that Booth had previously met Johnson in Nashville in February, 1864. At the time Booth was appearing in the newly opened Wood's Theatre. Also, author Hamilton Howard in Civil War Echoes (1907) made the claim that while Johnson was military governor of Tennessee, he and Booth kept a couple of sisters as mistresses and oftentimes were seen in each other's company. Lincoln had essentially ignored Johnson after Johnson's embarrassing behavior on Inauguration Day. Mary Todd Lincoln felt Johnson was involved. On March 15, 1866, she wrote to her friend, Sally Orne:

"...that, that miserable inebriate Johnson, had cognizance of my husband's death - Why, was that card of Booth's, found in his box, some acquaintance certainly existed - I have been deeply impressed, with the harrowing thought, that he, had an understanding with the conspirators & they knew their man... As sure, as you & I live, Johnson, had some hand, in all this..."

Some members of Congress also thought Johnson was involved and a special Assassination Committee was established to investigate any evidence linking Johnson to Lincoln's death. Nothing suspicious was ever found by the committee; yet a belief by some Americans that Johnson was somehow involved with Booth continued for many years.

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God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Dustoff 1
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That Griffon and John Wayne are in Ka--->Hoot's? [Roll Eyes]
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john wayne
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here's a good one from the same site:

Elvis died from an anal-hamster session gone bad, but the Hamster received Immortality.

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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john wayne
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Dust-off-
Griffon and John Wayne are brothers.
In kahoots is an understatement.
We do live three hours away but we still get together to fish whenever possible.

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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glassman
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quote:
Originally posted by Dustoff 1:
That Griffon and John Wayne are in Ka--->Hoot's? [Roll Eyes]

they annonced they are brothers...

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Don't envy the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise.

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Griffon
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There are many Illuminated groups, with different kinds of secret knowledge. Anything you might say about them (including this) will be false for some of the Illuminati, but true for others, which only adds to the confusion and mystery.

The Illuminati infiltrate and take over organizations of all kinds, from churches to the post office to the corner grocery store, and turn them to their own ends.

And, just as a black joke, some of their subject organizations advertise themselves as Secret Societies.

They have agents and "sleepers" planted everywhere. Many of these people have no idea who they are really reporting to. Others are active members of the conspiracy, working their way ever deeper into the fabric of society.

They control the schools in order to make sure that young people learn to enjoy strange tuneless music and weird outlandish games, and that they dress oddly.

They also try to recruit the best and the brightest young people as agents, to insure the next generation of the Conspiracy.

They constantly feud among themselves and war with other groups and organizations. Each group of Illuminati is constantly striving to increase its power base and undermine the competition.

Their first means of dealing with opposition is to buy it off. To any group as rich as the Illuminati, a few million dollars are nothing.

Next they try threats. Danger to possessions, status or loved ones has dissuaded many a would-be foe of Illuminati schemes.

And, of course, murder is an ancient political weapon. The Illuminati have been responsible for some of the most shocking assassinations of modern times.

They also replace people with doubles. For many years they recruited look-alikes who would serve their ends. Now they are perfecting cloning technology that will let them replace anybody.

Those who can't be dealt with any other way are discredited or driven mad.

The Illuminati conspiracy is hundreds, if not thousands, of years old. Many of the most famous names of history have been Illuminated, or Illuminati agents. Indeed, all of history is nothing more than an outside view of the schemes and struggles of the Illuminati.

And, of course, the Illuminati are constantly rewriting history to serve their own goals. For instance, modern schoolchildren are taught that there is no historical evidence of Jesus Christ, and they learn nothing about the Russo-German War or the state of Arcadia.

They control the news media, so you hear what they want you to about today's news. Any event that doesn't fit in with their program will be quickly hushed up.

In particular, they control television. They don't permit intelligent shows to survive; they encourage mind candy that will keep people from thinking. The only reason good shows are permitted to appear at all is to convince intelligent people that nobody else likes such material, and that there must be something wrong with them.

The Illuminati manipulate the stock market and control currencies on an international level. Your paycheck is worth just what the Illuminati want it to be.

Likewise, the entire "energy crisis" is an Illuminati invention. There's no shortage of energy, of a dozen different kinds, but plentiful free energy might threaten the Illuminated power base.

The Illuminati are doing their best to hold back the space program, for the same reason. If mankind was spread out through the solar system, they'd be much harder to control. [Not all the Illuminati agree on this. Some of them lust after the mineral wealth of space, and some want (literally) new worlds to conquer..

And some of them are in touch with aliens from outer space. Some of them ARE aliens. Why would "advanced beings" want to meddle with the affairs of Earthlings? Good question.

Worse, some of them have actual magical powers and are in league with forces from ... elsewhere. Great huge beings that are madness to look upon, or tiny, malicious things that glare and gibber from dark corners. They have pins and dolls; they know old names.

Other Illuminati have embraced technology. Their files of information are much more useful when backed by the power of the computer. They are also conditioning everyone to believe that computers are so complicated and dangerous that only the Experts should play with them. Next time you get an electric bill for $666,666.66, you know who's behind it.

And some of these technophiles have gone a step farther, creating actual machine intelligences. These sentient computers are now, themselves, a force amoung the ruling Illuminati.

The Illuminati don't like war; it's expensive and wasteful. War only happens when two groups of Illuminati are very evenly matched and neither is willing to negotiate. But then they whip a few nations into a patriotic fervor and go at it.

They send secret messages through the newspapers and airwaves -- in the classified ads, and even buried in news reports. They have other, even stranger forms of secret communications ... all around you, all the time.

They keep everyone -- yes, everyone -- under constant surveillance. Every time you fill out another questionnaire, you're weaving another strand of the net that binds the world.

They are working to make the law as confusing as possible, so everything will be illegal or potentially illegal -- then they have a hold on everybody and everyone will fear the laws.

They encourage resistance to authority among young people and political dissidents, to distract government attention from the real enemy within.

But when they reach a satisfactory level of control, they turn their efforts toward extinguishing independence and encouraging mindless obedience to whatever orders come from the Illuminati or their servants.

They commit random atrocities -- poisoning food at grocery stores, murdering old blind ladies, sniping on the freeway -- just to make people vaguely confused, frightened and paranoid.

They suppress inventions which might change the status quo. The 100-mile-a-gallon carburator, the perfect contraceptive, and the cornucopia plant are all lying in Illuminati vaults, waiting for the day when it will suit the Secret Masters to release them. What happened to the inventors? Bought off, intimidated, or just vanished.

On the other hand, they also maintain secret laboratories where they develop new weapons and devices of all kind.

Their arcane investigations cause all sorts of mysteries. Ever wonder about the Loch Ness Monster? The "cattle mutilations?" The Oregon Crud.

And they require hundreds of human victims every year for their experiments. Ever wonder why there are so many Missing Persons reports, and why so few of those people are found.

They are constantly experimenting with new types of mind control. They put drugs in drinking water, flash subliminal messages during movies and TV shows, and play instructions that you can't quite hear over supermarket loudspeakers. They experiment with microwaves and ultra-low-frequency devices, too.

And every wire in your house is a potential pathway for Illuminati messages, attacks or controlling rays. Did you ever stop to think just how many wires lead to your house? And do you have any idea where they really come from?

Naturally, they discourage investigation of the strange and unusual, because it might lead to them. But they encourage people to joke about the Illuminati.

They also publish supermarket tabloids, just to make sure that everybody thinks "Hitler's Brain Is Alive!" and "Bigfoot Seen In Hawaii" are just jokes.

And they encourage the craziest pseudo-science "researchers" they can find, because this tends to discredit legitimate investigators into the unusual.

A popular belief is that the Illuminati want power for its own sake. This is true of some of them. But other Illuminated groups exist to support an ideology, to achieve a particular goal, or simply to oppose some other group of Illuminati.

One of their chief preoccupations is life extension by any means possible. Nobody who has held ultimate power for fifty years is eager to let it go. Anything you can think of ... yoga, cryonics, body-exchange, magic, cloning, goat (or other) glands, transfusions, computerized personality duplication ... has been tried by the Illuminati at one time or another. And some of them work.

Furthermore, powerful Illuminati from past centuries lie waiting to be revived when science allows it. Mummies, pickled corpses, frozen bodies, conscious brains in jars ... you would recognize the names if we could mention them.

You're not cleared for this one.

They use disease as a weapon to discipline their own populations or destroy competing ones. Black Death in Europe, smallpox among the American Indians ... The swine flu, a few years ago, was thwarted by opposing forces, or you probably wouldn't be reading this.

They have a variety of unhuman and inhuman servants. The dreaded Men in Black are perhaps their best-known agents. No one knows whether the MIBs are androids, golems, or something even worse. Perhaps they were once human...

And they really are breeding a Master Race. The Nazis had no idea how they were being used, or why. And they'd be horrified at the Illuminati's idea of perfection.

The Illuminati know weird sexual techniques undreamed of in the Kama Sutra. They also know why those techniques are used.

The next time you spend too much money to buy something you didn't want or need, and it breaks in a week, you can be sure you've just contributed to an Illuminati fund-raising project.

They start chain letters. They also plant rumors that the Red Cross can buy an iron lung if you send them a million cigarette packages, and that dying children in England want ten million business cards. No one knows why they do this.

Fnord.

from http://www.sjgames.com/illuminati/50awful.htmlhttp://www.sjgames.com/illuminati/ 50awful.html

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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john wayne
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has anybody ever seen the guys on "Ghost Hunters" say that the place they studied was haunted?

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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glassman
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the Illuminati...
Robert Anton Wilson... he was a crackpot but fun to read..

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Don't envy the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise.

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john wayne
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One time on X-Files the cigarrette smoking guy said "Buffalo never wins a Super Bowl while I'm alive. Fix it"
It was said tongue in cheek kind of poking fun at the show.
huh. guess you had to be there.

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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Griffon
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Hey you know I love to collect conspiracy theory stories.

Did you know Princess Diana's death was an accident. The irony is she apparently was trying to fake her death to get away from all the publicity. Instead the accident killed her. Moral of the story: never try to get away from publicity? Or be careful how you try to fake death? you decide.

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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john wayne
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Speaking of Princess Diana

Dinosauroid-like Alien Reptiles are dominating the World

Christine Fitzgerald, a confidante of Diana, Princess of Wales, claims that Diana told her that the Royal Family were Reptilian aliens, and that they could shapeshift.

David Icke's --BBC reporter-- claims that humanity is actually under the control of dinosauroid-like alien reptiles who must consume human blood to maintain their human appearance.

"Evidence" goes from Sumerian tablets describing the "Anunnaki" (which he translates as "those who from heaven to earth came"), to the serpent in the Biblical Garden of Eden, to child abuse, fluoridation, and the genealogical connections between the Bush family and the House of Windsor.

Icke theorizes that the reptilians came here from the constellation Draco. Like most conspiracy theories, falsification of Icke's hypotheses is nearly impossible, but Icke continues to sell books and give speaking engagements based on concepts ranging from the New Age to his political opinions.

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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john wayne
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Kentucky Fried Chicken makes black men impotent

It is sometimes claimed that the Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise is owned by the Ku Klux Klan, and the chicken is laced with a drug that makes only black men impotent.

Ironically, the KFC franchise is actually owned by an African-American

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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Leslie C
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Actually it was Church's Chicken...

"Church’s Fried Chicken (1970s-80s)
Some people claimed that an ingredient in the batter would sterilize black males (or any inner-city resident with access to the fast-food joint). In response to the rumor, Church’s PR department printed a list of fourteen minority individuals as references–headed by the current director of the NAACP–and included positive hiring statistics showing that 72 percent of managers and 50 percent of the board were people of color. California congressman Jim Bates intervened with FDA testing when he heard his constituents’ worries about the food’s safety."


http://www.stayfreemagazine.org/archives/19/myths.html

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Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.- Oscar Wilde

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john wayne
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My God you mean a congressman fell for this? Wow that is out there.

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Thnaks Matto. Thanks Juice.

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Leslie C
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john wayne, the key word there was "California" not "congressman." [Wink]

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Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.- Oscar Wilde

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Griffon
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Good theory Leslie C

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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T e x
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quote:
Originally posted by glassman:
the Illuminati...
Robert Anton Wilson... he was a crackpot but fun to read..

crackpot? That's where I first learned how the "peace sign" originated, not to mention the whole 23 enigma...

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Nashoba Holba Chepulechi
Adventures in microcapitalism...

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Dustoff 1
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quote:
Originally posted by glassman:
quote:
Originally posted by Dustoff 1:
That Griffon and John Wayne are in Ka--->Hoot's? [Roll Eyes]

they annonced they are brothers...
-------------------------------------------------
The icon should of indicated my sarcasm...
Ha ha me pulled it off...

Picture worth a thousand words?
Sometimes, "not"

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Dustoff 1
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Picture worth a thousand words?
Thousands of words worth a picture when analyising "Conspearacy theorys"???

better look at the spelling of the author..Big picture that LOL [Cool] [Roll Eyes] [Big Grin] [Roll Eyes]

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glassman
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here's a really, really outrageous one

[Big Grin] enjoy.....


Former federal war crimes prosecutor John Loftus already claims knowledge of paperwork confirming secret dealings between Enron and the Taliban. According to Loftus an al-Qaeda document on this subject was discovered in 1998 by FBI counter-terrorism chief, John O'Neil, following the US embassy bombings in Africa.

The real dynamite, however, is that Loftus also claims that Cheney instructed the FBI in January 2001 to back-off investigations of al-Qaeda in order to protect Enron's interest in the development of a gas pipeline through Afghanistan. That pipeline was originally due to be built by Unocal, with no less than Henry Kissinger himself hired by them to advise on the project.

O'Neil resigned from the FBI in the summer of 2001 in protest at the attempts by the Bush administration to obstruct him in his pursuit of al-Qaeda - and the rest, as they say, is history. Or not quite.

Although O'Neil took a job at the World Trade Centre following his resignation and was killed in the attacks on 911, Loftus says that fellow FBI agent Robert Wright has compiled his own findings on the Enron block. Wright has, however, been prevented by his superiors from publishing them.


he took over head of security at the WTC

http://www.btinternet.com/~nlpWESSEX/Documents/WATinquirychaos.htm

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Don't envy the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise.

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Griffon
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That's a great one Glass.

Here at last is a description of the "Men in Black" dun-dun-da

http://aliens.monstrous.com/men_in_black.htm

and now we know who those pesky chasers of SG-1 are:

http://aliens.monstrous.com/majestic_12.htm

even more insidious that we imagined:

http://aliens.monstrous.com/jason_society.htm

I told you they ARE OUT THERE [Smile]

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Dustoff 1
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Don't you people know about Area 51? and the thousands of Afgan-ee's in there cultivating Pop-ee's so as the Government can secretly fund Stem cell research developement...

They screwed up tho...........Mixed up the Pop-ee's with the stem cells and now they have some very strange looking people swimming in a mirage... [Eek!]


the icon is taking your picture for the government....

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Gordon Bennett
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Area 51 is pretty out there. Pun intended.

--------------------
"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a
little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Benjamin Franklin

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Gordon Bennett
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But in general, I don't dismiss conspiracy theories too quickly. There's often some truth in them.

--------------------
"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a
little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Benjamin Franklin

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Dustoff 1
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Lockheed does some fine work in area 51..
So did MacDonald Douglas before they were taken over..Now MD is part of Boeing.

It's amazing how many people do not even know what the "Skunk Works are"..

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Griffon
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Gordon, which Area 51 theory are you talking about? There are so many [Smile] If you ever been out in that country, everything is "out there."

Looks like the moonscape. Speaking of which what do you think of that conspiracy theory? Did we go to the moon? And is the moon made of bleu cheese?

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God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Gordon Bennett
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The Alien Autopsy one.

--------------------
"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a
little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Benjamin Franklin

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Griffon
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Dustoff I missed your earlier post. Too funny! Keep those up and we can post 'em on one of those sites for CT

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Griffon
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Oh thats a great one Gordon. The video and all? I wish I could find that on DVD.

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Gordon Bennett
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Your wish has been fulfilled! Click Here. [Big Grin]

--------------------
"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a
little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Benjamin Franklin

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glassman
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quote:
Originally posted by Griffon:
Dustoff I missed your earlier post. Too funny! Keep those up and we can post 'em on one of those sites for CT

aha.....

CT....
hows debbie doing? she claimed she bought 100million share of CMKX, talk about conspircy theories that are real?

i felt sorry for her till she started getting nasty when i told her it was a scam....

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Don't envy the happiness of those who live in a fool's paradise.

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Relentless.
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How's about that susie or whatever her name was from the QBID threads who said she owned 264 million shares and rode them all the way down to triple zero hell..
That has to qualify

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Griffon
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Thanks Gordon! That's a classic. In some twisted way it ranks up there with Capone's Vault Geraldo Rivera did a long time back in the wacky TV department

--------------------
God's peace be with you
A salaam a lakum
Shalom Chevarim

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Gordon Bennett
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The most outrageous conspiracy theory I've ever heard? That Oswald acted alone. Or maybe that Bush won Florida. [Big Grin]

--------------------
"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a
little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Benjamin Franklin

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Buford Baucom
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Hi,

Did you all know that all the babies who got abortions during the past ten years are going to come back to life?

Boy, are they going to be pissed!

BB

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