Men's Secret Language Author- Unknown
1. "I'M GOING FISHING": Translated: I'm going to drink myself dangerously
stupid, and sit in a boat with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety." 2. "IT'S A GUY THING" Translated: "There is no rational thought
pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical" . 3. "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
4. "UH HUH, SURE HONEY," or, "YES, DEAR." Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
5. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest." 6. "I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST... I HAVE LOTS OF THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "Is that woman over there wearing a bra?" 7. "TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." 8. "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR." Translated: "Are you still talking?"
9. "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS." Translated: "I remember the theme song to "F-Troop," the address of the first girl I ever kissed, the license plate numbers of every car I've
ever owned, I just forgot your birthday." 10. "I DUNNO... I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND I GOT YOU THESE ROSES..."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
11. "OH, DON'T FUSS. I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL." Translated: "I have actually severed a
limb, but I will bleed to death before I admit that I am hurt."
12. "I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING". Translated: "... and I sure hope I think of some soon."
13. "I CAN'T FIND IT." Translated: "It didn't fall into my out stretched hands, so I'm completely clueless." 14. "WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"
15. "I HEARD YOU." Translated: "I have no idea what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that
you don't find out."
16. "YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE." Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me and I realize it could be worse."
17. "YOU LOOK TERRIFIC." Translated: "Oh God, please don't try on MORE clothes."
18. "I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."
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