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Can We Survive These People?

Can We Survive These People?

MAKES ME WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE !!!!!!
  
    I went to McDonald's. I looked at the menu
    and saw that you could have an order of 6,
    9 or  12 Chicken McNuggets.  I asked for a
    half-dozen  nuggets.  "We don't have a half-
    dozen nuggets,"  said the teenager at the
    counter.  "You don't?" I replied.  "We only
    have  six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
    "So I  can't order a half-dozen nuggets but
    I can order six?"  "That's right."  So I
    shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

*************************************************
  
    A lady at work was seen putting a credit card
    into  her floppy drive and pulling it out very
    quickly. When inquired as to what she was  doing,
    she said she was shopping on the Internet and
    they asked for a  credit card number, so she's
    using the ATM "thingy".
  
*************************************************
  
    I recently saw a distraught  young lady weeping
    beside her car.  "Do  you need some help?"  I
    asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced
    the battery to  this  remote door unlocker.  Now
    I can't get into my car.  Do you think they
    (pointing to a distant convenient store) would have
    a battery to fit this?"  "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you
    have an alarm too?"  I asked.  "No, just this remote
    thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys
    to me.  As I took the key and manually unlocked
    the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there
    and check about the batteries it's a long walk."

*************************************************
  
    Several years ago, we had an  intern who was none
    too swift.  One day, he was typing and turned to a
    secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper.
    What do I do?"  "Just use copier machine paper,"
    the secretary told him.  With that, the intern took
    his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on
    the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank"
    copies.
  
  *************************************************
  
    I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a
    large motor home was towed into the garage. The
    front of the vehicle was in  dire need of repair
    and the whole thing generally looked like an extra
    in "Twister".  I asked the manager what  had happened.
    He told me that the driver had set the "cruise
    control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
  
  *************************************************
  
    IDIOTS AT WORK...
    Sign in a gas station: Coke -- 49 cents.
    Two for a  dollar.
  
*************************************************
  
    IDIOTS & COMPUTERS
    My neighbor works in the operations  department in
    the central office of a large bank. Employees in
    the field call him when they have problems with
    their  computers. One night he got a call from a
    woman in one of the branch banks who had this
    question:  "I've got smoke coming from the back of
    my terminal.  Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
  
*************************************************
  
    IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE
    I was sitting in my science class, when the teacher
    commented that the next day would  be the shortest
    day of the year. My lab partner became visibly
    excited,  cheering and  clapping. I explained to her that the
    amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of
    time.  Needless to say, she was very disappointed
.

Author(s) Unknown

 

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